Once upon a time, I lived under the illusion that I was fooling everyone, because I was just a little bit smarter.
Never mind that my drinking and “recreational drugging” rendered me dumber than a bucketful of hammers.
Nobody was fooled.
There are basically two types of people roaming around the planet:
1. Those who show up, do the right thing, and hold themselves accountable.
2. Knuckleheads who just want to see what they can get away with.
At one time, we’ve all pretty much been one or the other.
Before sobriety, I was a First Class #2.
…I wouldn’t recognize integrity if it was in the shower with me.
After discovering and embracing Alcoholics Anonymous, I morphed into a #1.
As a #2 knucklehead, I lived in fear (namely, the fear of getting caught)…with a lovely dose of paranoia thrown in. I was wound tighter than a two dollar watch.
Trust me, living on the edge like that is no way to live.
The only ‘Singleness of Purpose‘ I recognized dealt with using people, trying to get something for nothing, catching that all important buzz – and not getting caught in the process.
‘I got ’em all fooled!’
Nobody was fooled.
People aren’t stupid.
You can lie, but they always learn the truth.
I consider the greatest gift that God ever gave me was to find Alcoholics Anonymous before destroying myself. I had to be beaten and bludgeoned into a state of reasonableness, and tender my unconditional surrender. It didn’t just magically happen. I had to go through that same wringer we all experience. But I did it, and I get to be here with you guys.
I wasn’t sober very long before amazing things started happening.
People stopped treating me like some kind of outpatient, and I felt better than I thought possible.
I started getting more responsibility at work, and my family stopped giving me grief.
One great byproduct: I was no longer afraid.
Sober Clubs and meetings usually have all the accoutrements of recovery: the Steps, Traditions, and slogans proudly on display. Wanna know why? It’s not because they look cute or because it’s cheaper than wallpapering the joint. That’s our road map. It’s what we’re about.
Do this stuff long enough, and in spite of your best efforts, you’ll evolve into a decent human being. You’ll become the person you wanted to be, but always though was beyond your grasp.
HERE’S THE TAKEAWAY:
This is not a temporary hobby or a whimsical diversion. This is a lifelong discipline. A blueprint for the meaningful life you’d been seeking all along.
The endgame here is to die a dignified, sober, peaceful death surrounded by loved ones – knowing your life counted for something, and you made a difference.
Living in a constant state of panic is now a distant memory.
Thank God for Alcoholics Anonymous.
The Promises won’t just happen. Instead, they’ll become an ongoing condition of your life.
Be advised:
There’s nothing in The Promises about glamorous prizes or cash awards. At least not for me. My life isn’t that sexy.
Either way, I’ve got nothing to complain about (I could complain, but nobody ever listens).
Don’t cry for me Argentina. My life is so much better.
